Conflict in marriage is a given. How we handle that conflict can make or break you, or the marriage. With couples counseling, you can overcome, or avoid an enormous amount of damage, pain, heartache, and grief. In Emil book “You can turn conflict into closeness” he explains this is an innovative fashion. He will teach how to identify criticisms, questions declarations or commands, in martial conflict.
In marital conflict, we often choose our words poorly. The response to an accusation or declaration can cause hurt in your partner and ultimately remorse within you. Making it harder to move on, or repair the damages.
It often is more than just the words we use, but our attitude and especially our response. Can you respond without raising your voice? Yelling and screaming at your spouse or partner. Or using a diversion like “I already did that” or “You haven’t even checked” This kind of statements is frequently misunderstood, or taken for an excuse.
All too often we just do not even listen. Have you ever caught yourself formulating a response before their sentence is even finished? In a marital conflict or fight, you would be considered wise to simply listen. Take note for the four criticisms, mentioned above. When you hear one, it may signify the start of a marital conflict, or argument.
I cannot emphasize the art of listening enough. It is important to recognize a potential marital conflict, by looking for the magic words. Once recognized, it is important to listen and understand the other point of view, and then you can tactfully craft a response. One that is productive and eloquent, while easing the tension or marital conflict.
If you haven’t joined Emil’s Marriage Club yet, please do. This program of Emil’s will provide easy to use and rules to follow, to save or improve your marriage. Communication has long been publicized as the down fall of many marriages. With simple step by step rules of engagement, you can avoid marital conflict, and turn chaos into closeness.
Use these tools to turn marital conflict into love.